Monday, 29 June 2009

Sam Goes To It

Old Sam is very annoyed in WW2 when his allotment gets bombed by the Germans and so he promptly enlists to join his old regiment - or he trys to - such is the spirit of a Lancastrian.

by Marriott Edgar (1941)

Sam Small had retired from the Army
In the old Duke of Wellington's time,
So when present unpleasantness started
He were what you might call past his prime.

He'd lived for some years in retirement
And knew nowt of the war, if you please,
'Til they blasted and bombed his allotment,
And shelled the best part of his peas.

'Twere as if bugles called Sam to duty
For his musket he started to search;
He found it at last in the hen house
Buff Orpingtons had it for t'perch.

Straight off to the 'Fusilier's' depot
He went to rejoin his old troop -
Where he found as they couldn't recruit him
Until all his age group was called up.

Now Sam wasn't getting no younger,
Past the three score and ten mark was he,
And they reckoned by t'time they reached his group
He'd be very near ten score and three.

So he took up the matter with Churchill
Who said, I don't know what to do,
Never was there a time when so many
Came asking so much of so few."

"I don't want no favours," Sam answered,
"Don't think as I'm one of that mob.
All I'm asking is give me the tools, lad,
And let me 'elp finish the job."

"I'll fit you in somewhere," said Winnie,
"Old Soldiers we must not discard."
Then seeing he'd got his own musket
He sent him to join the Home Guard.

They gave Sam a coat with no stripes on,
In spite of the service he'd seen
Which considering he'd been a King's Sergeant
Kind of rankled - you see what I mean ?

He said, "I come back to the Army
Expecting my country's thanks,
And the first thing I find when I get here
Is that I've been reduced to the ranks."

He found all the lads sympathetic,
They agreed that it were a disgrace,
Except one old chap in the corner
With a nutcracker kind of a face.

Said the old 'feller', "Who do you you think you are ?
The last to appear on the scene,
And you start off by wanting promotion;
Last come, last served - see what I mean ?"

Said Sam, "Wasn't I at Corunna,
And when Company Commander got shot,
Didn't I lead battalion to victory ?"
Said the old fella, "No, you did not."

"I didn't ? said Sam quite idignent,
"Why, in every fight Wellington fought
Wasn't I at his right hand to guard him ?"
Said old chap, "You were nowt of the sort."

"What do you know of Duke and his
battles ?"
Said Sam with a withering look.
Said the old man, "I ought to know something,
Between you and me, I'm the Duke."

And if you should look in any evening,
You'll find them both in the canteen,
Ex Commander-in-Chief and ex Sergeant
Both just Home Guards - you see what I mean ?"


  1. Hi Eddie....It's me :-))
    I laughed at the LOL remark you made to the lady. Tooo funny!!!
    Also, I didn't realize the Uplifting Award was for me.... I don't know why I didn't realize it.... I thought it was only the fish and chips...and I didn't really know what to do with it. Thank you very much. That made my day to receive really did. (It's on my blog now!)
    Now, in answer to your question... That is 'moi'...'me' the photo on my blog I have my old camera stuck to my face. That photo was taken about 3 weeks ago. A friend of mine took a photo of me taking a photo of a friend. (Does that make sense??) I will be 59 in August. You are sweet (and funny about the Concord...) and I can see why everyone immediately is drawn to you at work and I'm sure at home and church.
    We are about to have another of those good old South Georgia thunderstorms. Our telephone woke us last night with a "Code Red" alert. Our county calls when there is severe weather in our area. To be awakened by a call to 'take shelter' is less than disconcerting. I would have slept through it....but...noooooo, I was now wide awake waiting to be swept to Kansas....and see a witch on a broom and flying monkeys...sigh. Turns out it was a bad storm....I'm not sure that we got hail....but someone did.
    Thank you again for your post to my blog. It did my heart good. You are very good at that, Eddie....doing one's heart good....and I know that. Just wanted you to know that I know.
    Take care of you. I'll be baaaaaaaaack.

  2. Hi Eddie, another great poem tonight. I really enjoy them. I was away for a couple of days and only got your comments tonight. Is my blog still slow? Are you able to hear my music? I'm not sure what is happening but am glad you told me.......:-) Hugs

  3. Crazy. Actually it reminded me of what I read about Churchill recently, that at one point aged 69 he was travelling overnight (by train) back to London and had been suffering with something bad (pneumonia?). He got to London, went straight to parliament and took part in PM's questions with all the vigour of a politics student!


Welcome, pull up a chair and enjoy


Related Posts with Thumbnails