Wednesday 23 March 2011

Dave Allen's Thoughts On Religion

After his last hilarious you tube on Adam and Eve, shown on my previous post, I present Dave Allen's masterpiece on Religion and how a four year old boy was expected by a convent nun to understand several complex theological doctrines including the Trinity and Omnipresence.  It is an absolute riot. LOL

I hope you enjoyed that as much as I did - and of course it is all just tongue in cheek and innocent fun - I think, although Dave Allen did upset some religious people in his time.

Whilst writing I note from my marvellous little book entitled "The Book Of Heroic Failures" reference to a highly popular and exciting production of the Holy Bible.  This was all about the most unsuccessful version of the Bible ever printed.  In 1631 Messrs Robert Barker and Martin Lucas, the King's printers in London obviously failed to proof read the script properly.  It contained several mistakes, but one was 'inspired'.  The word 'not' was omitted from The Seventh Commandment and enjoined its readers, on the highest authority, to commit adultery.
Fearing the popularity with which this might be received in remote country districts, King Charles I called all 1,000 copies back in and fined the printers £3,000.
What a spoil sport!! LOL

Tuesday 8 March 2011

More Dave Allen

Dave Allen was well known for his religious sketches. Here is one about creation and the psychology of Genesis with his typical sense of humour in which he wonders why tell a woman, of all people, not to eat the fruit and actually shows her where it was.  I shall say no more except excuse me while I duck for cover!! LOL.

All tongue in cheek of course.

Reminds me of a couple of jokes:
Q. How will we recognise Adam when we get to Heaven?
A. either He will have one rib less than everyone else
or He will have no Navel.
second joke:
Q. How will we recognise Eve when we get to Heaven
A. She will have no Navel either.
or she will have rosy apple red cheeks.


Third joke:
God tells Adam he has created a woman for him to share his life.
Adam asks, "Where is she?"
God says, "Walk along the path and I will lead you to her".
Adam says, "What's a path?"
God says, "It's a small road, at the end of it is a cave and she is in it."
Adam says, "What's a cave?"
God sighs and said, "It's a hole in the side of a mountain! - go in and you will find her."
Adam says, "When I find her what will I do?"
God says, "Don't worry, you will know for I have programmed you - there you have arrived and now go in and meet her!"
Adam says, "OK!"
After 10 minutes Adam comes out wearing a puzzled frown and God says, "What's the matter now?"
Adam says, "What's a head ache?"

LOL

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